My Bucket List

I don’t want to go skydiving.

I’ve never really wanted to, and I don’t know if I ever will.

In truth, there are a lot of “bucket list” items out there that I don’t really have any interest in doing. There are so many places to travel, so many things to do, so many sites to see, and all of them are considered “once in a lifetime,” but I can’t help but feel like I’d be just fine with them not being apart of my lifetime.

I don’t have a bucket list, which is kind of strange when I think about it. I have just about everything else listed out. I start my day with a checklist. I start my week with a different checklist.

A bucket list is this ultimate checklist. It takes planning and researching, and all of the things that I love so much, and yet, I’ve never made one.

However, when I think about making one, nothing appeals to me.

I am only 25-years-old and there is not a single thing or experience that I feel compelled to do before I die.

Some people would have you believe that this is weird… wrong… unmotivated. I just think it’s how I’m wired, and if you delete your Instagram for a few months, some of you might find that you might not be wired quite so differently than me.

We’ve all heard the Tim McGraw song, Live Like You Were Dying. We’ve all belted it in the car, nearly passing out trying to hold that last note. I love that song, and I love the message in it.

But that way of life. That do-driven purpose. That just doesn’t make my heart sing.

And that’s okay.

Some people have this admirable spirit, this need for speed and adrenaline. Some people have a hunger to live like they’re dying, to capture every opportunity that comes their way. They need to feel those chemicals inside them declare “You are alive!”

But that is some people. And it has taken me a while to realize that I am not one of those people, and I truly don’t believe that I will lay on my death bed one day wishing that I was.

When I think about my happiest moments in life, they rarely occur in the “once in a lifetime” moments. While I appreciate these unique experiences, I’m happiest around familiarity. I am happiest in my own home or working in my own garden. I am happiest at the beach town that I have been visiting since I was a teenager. I am happiest when sitting around the table with my favorite people celebrating pizza Friday. I am happiest when watching Happy Gilmore with my husband for the millionth time while he quotes all the lines.

I am happiest in the “many in a lifetime” moments.

I have realized that my happy comes from moments that I can repeat every day.

I have realized that my joy doesn’t come from living like I’m dying, but from living like I’m living.

I have realized that my sense of happy comes from being, not doing. I feel most alive when I am being the person I want to be- and I do that best in the places that are loved and familiar to me.

So this is my bucket list:

  • Be loving
  • Be lovely
  • Be hopeful
  • Be present
  • Be my own version of happy

No pressure of going anywhere. No pressure of doing anything. Just. Being.

For me, joy comes from living like I am living. It comes from the faith that I will remain. For me, there is joy in planting an apple tree today and believing that I’ll still be around to see the fruits of it in three years. (So much love for my father-in-law for this faith-filled gesture).

For me, joy doesn’t come at the top of a mountain. It doesn’t come from free falling through the sky. But that’s just me.

I encourage you to take time to create a bucket list that reflects what makes your soul happy.

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